A set based off of the webcomic Homestuck. If you don't know what that is, be warned: this set contains SPOILERS.
If you want more information on the set, I wrote a series of articles explaining various design choices and spotlighting cards. If you have other questions or are looking for people to play with, we have a discord server here.
Mechanics
Experience Counters ()
Cards can grant you experience counters either through being played or as a reward for accomplishing a task. As you grow in experience, those same cards will get better - some provide additional bonuses on reaching a specific threshold, some provide bonuses each time the player gains experience, and some have effects that scale with how much experience you have.
Prototype N (You may exile up to N creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) ()
The number next to the keyword Prototype indicates how many creature cards can be exiled from your graveyard when you cast it. For each card you choose to exile, the creature gets a +1/+1 counter. Some cards have additional interactions with the creatures they prototype.
Carapacian Tribal ()
Several cards provide a benefit for playing with cards that have the Carapacian creature type. Carapacians are primarily in white and black, and tend to favor having large numbers of cheap creatures. To support this, many cards also create Carapacian tokens:1/1 creatures with either vigilance if white or lifelink if black.
Draft Archetypes
- Enchantments Matter
Carapacian Mailperson Creative Alchemy Serpent of Cetus
- Experience Counters
Salamancer Wizened Questgiver Behatted Champion
- Prototype
Amber Ogre Devestating Giclops Mushroom Farmer
- Creature Sacrifice
Slithering Basilisk Necromantic Lich Devious Imp
- Carapacians
Prospitian Captain Battlefield Marhsal Dersite Captain
How to play
To run a draft or sealed event, log into Planesculptors and click "host event" in the upper left.
To play matches with TFP cards, you can download Cockatrice or play in your browser on Untap.in.
Cockatrice:
Download the set files here.
Open Cockatrice.
Click Card Database > Open custom image folder. Drag the "TFP" folder from the files you downloaded into the custom images folder.
Go back into Cockatrice and click Card Database > Open custom set folder. Drag the "TFP.xml" and "TFP Tokens.xml" files into the custom set folder.
Go back into Cockatrice and click Card Database > Manage sets. Find the set with the code "TFP" and ensure that the box for it in the "Enabled" column is checked.
Press "OK" to finish installing the set. You should now be able to find TFP cards in your card database and add them to decks.
Untap.in:
All TFP cards are available on Untap - just search for them in the deck editor to access them. The set code has underscores before and after it so that there are no conflicts in the event WOTC releases an official set with the code TFP.
Additional Resources
Art Contribution: Several cards are currently missing art. If you want to contribute you can do so here.
Creature — Carapacian Pilot Common | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) | |
Genetically engineering the perfect pilot is easy when you can simply copy their future self. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
, : Tap target creature. | |
He is the law. | |
1/2 | |
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Legendary Creature — Salamander Mythic | |
When Beloved Companion enters the battlefield, return all nonland permanents with converted mana cost 3 or less from your graveyard to the battlefield. | |
“I could spend my life in this sweet surrender, I could stay lost in this moment forever” — Michael Guy Bowman | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Uncommon | |
, Sacrifice Carapacian Folk Hero: Put a +1/+1 counter on each Carapacian you control. | |
It ended in tragedy of course, which is typical of their folktales. But it is no less inspiring. | |
1/1 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Scout Common | |
Carapacian Mailperson has lifelink as long as you control an enchantment or there is an enchantment in your graveyard. | |
Liberty. Reason. Justice. Civility. Edification. Perfection. MAIL. | |
2/1 | |
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Creature — Lizard Scout Common | |
LOHAC’s consorts work tirelessly to maintain the massive mechanisms that they live atop. | |
2/5 | |
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Creature — Turtle Warrior Common | |
Whenever you attack with two or more creatures, you get two experience counters. Coralsmith Prodigy has first strike as long as you have 4 or more experience counters. | |
3/1 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Exile target artifact or enchantment. | |
As the Reckoning begins, Skaia’s paradoxical defenses stave off its destruction as long as possible. | |
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Instant Common | |
En Passant deals 3 damage to target attacking or blocking creature. | |
Even the lowliest pawn can make a difference on the battlefield. | |
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Creature — Salamander Artificer Common | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) , Sacrifice Fire Brigade: Destroy target enchantment. | |
1/2 | |
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Creature — Lizard Warrior Uncommon | |
Vigilance (Attacking doesn’t cause this creature to tap.) Flockodile’s power and toughness are each equal to the number of creatures you control. | |
0/0 | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
When Green Sun’s Power enters the battlefield, exile target nonland permanent with converted mana cost four or less until Green Sun’s Power leaves the battlefield. | |
On top of being nigh-omniscient and incredibly charismatic, first guardians can channel the overwhelming power of the green sun at will. | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Creatures you control get +2/+1 until end of turn. Carapacians you control gain first strike until end of turn. | |
“Though we adore Him we shall never enjoy His beauteous Croak. We spill our blood on acres of black and white so they may cross the yellow yard.” — Prospitian Religious Text | |
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Instant Common | |
You get two experience counters. Then, you gain life equal to the number of experience counters you have. Draw a card. | |
Dreamselves awaken among the shining spires of Prospit and Derse. | |
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Creature — Carapacian Knight Common | |
When King’s Guard enters the battlefield, target Carapacian gets +1/+1 and gains indestructible until end of turn. | |
Most of the diagrams in this book involve a soldier advancing by a single tile, either straight ahead, or diagonally when lunging with a weapon. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Uncommon | |
At the beginning of your end step, you get an experience counter. Then, if you have 5 or more experience counters, create a 1/1 white Carapacian creature token with vigilance. | |
4/5 | |
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Enchantment Rare | |
Creatures you control get +1/+1. Sacrifice Prospit’s Last Stand: Creatures you control gain indestructible until end of turn. | |
Prospitians fight all the more valiantly knowing they are destined to lose. | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
Whenever a Carapacian you control attacks, you gain 1 life. | |
To Prospit, frogs are sacred creatures that must be protected. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Knight Uncommon | |
First strike, hexproof from black (This creature can’t be the target of black spells or abilities your opponents control.) Whenever a black creature enters the battlefield, you gain 1 life. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Knight Common | |
When Prospitian Knight enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, exile target card from an opponent’s graveyard. | |
3/5 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
When Prospitian Pawns enters the battlefield, create a 1/1 white Carapacian creature token with vigilance. | |
Every Prospitian soldier is willing to give their life to delay the Reckoning even by a moment. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Beast Rare | |
Vigilance (Attacking doesn’t cause this creature to tap.) When Protective Lusus enters the battlefield, another target creature you control gains indestructible for as long as you control Protective Lusus. | |
3/4 | |
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Creature — Salamander Scout Uncommon | |
Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.) The first time you gain life each turn, you get an experience counter. Other creatures you control have lifelink as long as you have 6 or more experience counters. | |
2/3 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Uncommon | |
Queen’s Operative can’t be blocked by creature tokens. | |
Hard-boiled. | |
2/1 | |
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Enchantment Common | |
When Queen’s Orders enters the battlefield, create a 1/1 white Carapacian creature token with vigilance. , Sacrifice Queen’s Orders: Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery. | |
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Enchantment — Aura Common | |
Enchant creature When Regulator’s Judgment enters the battlefield, create a 1/1 white Carapacian creature token with vigilance. Enchanted creature can’t attack or block. | |
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Instant Rare | |
Exile target creature or planeswalker that attacked, blocked, or activated an ability this turn. | |
A god’s death must be Heroic or Just. Those terms are defined broadly, mysteriously, and according to the case of the individual. | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
Creatures you control can block an additional creature each combat. Sacrifice Sacrificial Gambit: Prevent all damage that would be dealt to you this turn. | |
“At last in Skaia’s reflection through broken glass He may find the pond in which He’s meant to squat.” — Prospitian Religious Text | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Enchant creature When Skaia’s Guidance enters the battlefield, choose a color. Enchanted creature gets +2/+2 and has hexproof from the chosen color. (It can’t be the target of spells or abilities of that color.) | |
Seemingly random events make up complex chains of causality, all orchestrated by Skaia. | |
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Creature — Carpacian Cleric Common | |
: Skaian Scholar gains hexproof until end of turn. | |
“Maimed Clown. Undead Cat. Impaled Crow. Omnipotent Dog. These four shall be held in reverence for the eternity they serve to cut short.” — Prospitian Religious Text | |
1/3 | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
Whenever one or more creatures you control become tapped, you get an experience counter. Sacrifice Special Delivery: Search your library for an artifact or enchantment card, reveal it, and put it into your hand. Then, shuffle your library. Activate this ability only if you have 5 or more experience counters. | |
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Creature — Turtle Cleric Uncommon | |
Vigilance When Tablet Carver enters the battlefield, if you control an enchantment or there is an enchantment in your graveyard, draw a card. | |
4/3 | |
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Legendary Creature — Carapacian Rare | |
Whenever Warweary Villein or another Carapacian you control dies, each opponent skips their next combat phase. | |
You hate kings and you think kings are really stupid. They are petty, bossy tyrants and are really full of themselves and are basically awful in every way. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Rare | |
First strike As long as you control an enchantment or there is an enchantment in your graveyard, Wasteland Wanderer has double strike. | |
A mistress becomes a mendicant. | |
2/2 | |
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Enchantment — Aura Common | |
Enchant creature When White Queen’s Blessing enters the battlefield, create a 1/1 white Carapacian creature token with vigilance. Enchanted creature gets +2/+2 and has vigilance. | |
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Enchantment — Aura Common | |
Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has flying. | |
pchoooo | |
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Legendary Creature — Faerie Rare | |
Flash (You may cast this spell any time you could cast an instant.) When Cans enters the battlefield, put target creature an opponent controls into its owner’s library third from the top. , Discard a card: Return Cans to its owner’s hand. | |
3/4 | |
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Creature — Octopus Uncommon | |
Flash (You may cast this spell any time you could cast an instant.) Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) When Chalk Kraken enters the battlefield, target creature gets -X/-0 until end of turn, where X is its power. | |
3/3 | |
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Creature — Ogre Common | |
Hexproof (This creature can’t be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) | |
4/2 | |
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Sorcery Uncommon | |
You get two experience counters. Then, gain control of target creature if its converted mana cost is equal to or less than the number of experience counters you have. | |
“What would you ask me?” — Doc Scratch | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Choose a counter on target permanent or player. Give that permanent or player another counter of that kind. Draw a card. | |
The Magic Cue Ball makes predictions with unerring accuracy, but lacks a portal on its surface through which to view its predictions. | |
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Creature — Merfolk Rogue Common | |
Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, you get an experience counter. Daring Amphibian can’t be blocked as long as you have 4 or more experience counters. | |
2/1 | |
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Enchantment Mythic | |
Whenever a spell or ability you control counters a spell, you get two experience counters. , Sacrifice Denizen’s Choice: Target opponent chooses one — • You create an X/X blue Avatar creature token with hexproof, where X is the number of experience counters you have. • You draw X cards, where X is the number of experience counters you have. | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) | |
2/3 | |
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Creature — Faerie Rare | |
Flash : Scry 2, then reveal the top card of your library. If that card’s converted mana cost is odd, Felt Goon gets +2/-2 until end of turn. Otherwise, return Felt Goon to your hand. Activate this ability only once each turn. | |
3/3 | |
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Enchantment Rare | |
When Fetch Modus enters the battlefield, exile all cards from your hand, then draw that many cards. : Return the card exiled by Fetch Modus with the lowest converted mana cost or tied for lowest converted mana cost to its owner’s hand. | |
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Creature — Merfolk Wizard Uncommon | |
Whenever you draw a card, you get an experience counter. Whenever you would draw a card, if you have 5 or more experience counters, instead look at the top two cards of your library. Put one into your hand and the other on the bottom of your library. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Merfolk Warrior Common | |
, : You get an experience counter. Frontier Forager gets +2/+2 as long as you have 4 or more experience counters. | |
The consorts of all four lands hold frogs in sacred reverence. | |
2/3 | |
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Creature — Zombie Common | |
When Frozen Fiend enters the battlefield, return target creature to its owner’s hand. | |
SBURB’s minions are not always simple-minded monsters. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Human Artificer Rare | |
At the beginning of your upkeep, if you cast a spell during your opponent’s last turn, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, target creature gains “: Draw a card.” until the beginning of your next turn. | |
1/3 | |
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Instant Common | |
Tap target creature. It doesn’t untap during its controller’s next untap step. Draw a card. | |
He will break free any moment. You may release him, and die now. Or you may continue to hold him, and die later. | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Scry 2, then draw two cards. (To scry 2, look at the top two cards of your library, then put any number of them on the bottom of your library and the rest on top in any order.) | |
“I have used a spell to rip this walkthrough from Earth’s decaying networks, and sealed it in one of the servers floating in the Furthest Ring.” — Rose Lalonde | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Put target artifact or creature into its owner’s library second from the top. | |
You hate time travel. | |
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Creature — Avatar Rare | |
Prototype 2 Kernelsprite has all abilities and creature types of cards exiled by it. | |
The kernelsprite has particular attraction to the deceased or the doomed. Across every session ever played, exceptions to this pattern are extremely rare. | |
1/1 | |
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Instant Common | |
You get two experience counters. Then, counter target spell unless its controller pays , where X is the number of experience counters you have. | |
It’s a shame it had to come to this. You don’t like summoning the spirits of the dead to settle scores. But if she had to face her victims again, maybe she’d finally learn to feel remorse. | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Counter target spell. If you control an enchantment or there is an enchantment in your graveyard, scry 2. (To scry 2, look at the top two cards of your library, then put any number of them on the bottom of your library and the rest on top in any order.) | |
“Just another pair of cheaters attempting to play with their cards face up. Amateurs.” — Doc Scratch | |
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Enchantment — Aura Common | |
Enchant creature At the beginning of each upkeep, if enchanted creature is untapped, tap it. | |
“youre asleep again arent you” — Dave Strider | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
At the beginning of your upkeep, reveal the top card of your library. If it’s a noncreature, nonland card, you get an experience counter. Sacrifice Prophetic Dreams: Draw three cards. Activate this ability only if you have 5 or more experience counters. | |
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Creature — Bird Uncommon | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) , Sacrifice Rambunctious Crow: Gain control of target artifact or enchantment. If that permanent is an Aura or an Equipment, you may attach it to target creature you control. | |
2/3 | |
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Creature — Salamander Wizard Common | |
When Salamancer enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, target player puts the top three cards of their library into their graveyard. | |
2/4 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Target creature becomes an artifact in addition to its other types and has base power and toughness 0/1 until end of turn. | |
Thits shits lasting forever | |
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Sorcery Common | |
You get two experience counters. Then, draw X cards and discard X minus two cards, where X is the number of experience counters you have. | |
“What do you know about the Green Sun?” - Rose Lalonde | |
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Creature — Serpent Common | |
Serpent of Cetus can’t attack unless you control an enchantment or there is an enchantment in your graveyard. | |
Cetus’s children slumber deep beneath LOLAR’s seas, awakening only when their mother tasks them. | |
6/6 | |
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Creature — Merfolk Warrior Common | |
Creatures blocking or blocked by Slippery Iguana get -2/-0 as long as you control an enchantment or an enchantment is in your graveyard. | |
The consorts have no armies. Their only defense against the underlings is to flee. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Bird Common | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) When Swarm of Hummingbirds enters the battlefield, put the top two cards of your library into your graveyard. | |
They gather to mourn death and celebrate rebirth. | |
1/1 | |
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Sorcery Rare | |
You take an extra turn after this one. After that turn, skip your next turn. Exile Temporal Shenanigans. | |
“the thing with time travel is you cant overthink it just roll with it and see what happens” — Dave Strider | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Tap all creatures your opponents control. Draw a card. | |
“DO THE WINDY THING DO THE WINDY THING DO THE WINDY THING” — WV | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Flash (You may cast this spell any time you could cast an instant.) Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +2/+2. | |
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Creature — Human Spirit Rare | |
Whenever Trickster Sprite deals combat damage to a creature, tap that creature. It doesn’t untap during its controller’s next untap step. Whenever a creature an opponent controls becomes tapped, draw a card. | |
1/4 | |
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Creature — Turtle Wizard Common | |
When Village Sage enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, scry 1. (To scry 1, look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom of your library.) | |
1/3 | |
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Enchantment Common | |
At the beginning of your upkeep, look at the top card of your library. You may put it into your graveyard. | |
“What would you say if I said a reserved girl enamored by what dwelt in shadow was selected by the horrorterrors for service, and did their bidding at every step while convinced of her own autonomy?” — Doc Scratch | |
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Creature — Turtle Wizard Uncommon | |
Flash (You may cast this spell any time you could cast an instant.) When Witch of Oglogoth enters the battlefield, tap target creature. If you control an enchantment or there is an enchantment in your graveyard, that creature doesn’t untap during its controller’s next untap step. | |
3/3 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
Menace (This creature can’t be blocked except by two or more creatures.) When Brutal Warden enters the battlefield, create a 1/1 black Carapacian creature token with lifelink. | |
On Derse, the nearest prison is never more than five minutes away. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
When Cannon Fodder dies, create a 1/1 black Carapacian creature token with lifelink. | |
Every Dersite soldier is willing to give someone else’s life to bring the Reckoning even a moment closer. | |
1/1 | |
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Sorcery Rare | |
Destroy all creatures and planeswalkers. | |
“theyre always throwing around these geographical comparisons to give us a sense of scale like it really means anything to us” — Dave Strider | |
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Sorcery Uncommon | |
All creatures get -2/-2 until end of turn. Create a 1/1 black Carapacian creature token with lifelink at the beginning of the next end step. | |
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Creature — Carapacian Uncommon | |
When Courtyard Droll dies, destroy target creature. | |
You’re a busy guy so you just pick up any old thing and put it on your head. | |
1/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Rare | |
Sacrifice another creature: Cruel Commander Gains your choice of haste, menace, or lifelink until end of turn. | |
Every square taken on the battlefield comes at a bloody cost. | |
3/4 | |
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Creature — Spider Rare | |
Menace At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice another creature. If you can’t, Demanding Lusus deals 8 damage to you. | |
Some lusii protect their charges. Others take advantage of them. | |
8/8 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
Whenever a Carapacian you control attacks, each opponent loses 1 life. | |
To Derse, frogs are vile abominations that must be destroyed. | |
3/3 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Knight Uncommon | |
First strike, hexproof from white (This creature can’t be the target of white spells or abilities your opponents control.) Whenever a white creature enters the battlefield, each opponent loses 1 life. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Advisor Uncommon | |
Whenever Draconian Dignitary or another creature you control dies, each opponent loses 1 life and you gain 1 life. | |
Someone needs to grab the reins on timeline management here. These delinquents waste too much time. Can’t seem to conduct their business with any efficiency at all. | |
3/2 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Target opponent reveals their hand. You choose a noncreature, nonland card from it. That player discards that card. | |
Most of the interrogation is in the intimidating silence. | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Destroy target creature. Target player puts the top three cards of their library into their graveyard. | |
“if we make mistakes then dead daves start piling up and dead daves are the enemy remember” — Dave Strider | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Return target creature card from your graveyard to your hand. You gain 4 life. | |
“THAT’S THE RULE, JOHN. YOU KISS A DEAD PLAYER IN TIME, AND THEIR DREAM SELF TAKES OVER, ASSUMING THEY STILL HAVE ONE.” — Karkat Vantas | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Target player draws four cards and loses 4 life. | |
Looking out at the void of the furthest ring is an invitation for the horrorterrors to look back at you. | |
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Legendary Creature — Kraken Horror Mythic | |
Trample When Gl’bgolyb, Siren Song, Siren Song enters the battlefield, destroy all other creatures you control. If Gl’bgolyb, Siren Song is exiled by a creature with prototype, that creature gets +3/+3 and have “When this creature enters the battlefield, destroy all other creatures you control.” | |
8/7 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Uncommon | |
Whenever Hegemonic Brute or another Carapacian you control dies, you draw a card and lose 1 life. | |
If anyone tried to steal your WAX LIPS, you would eat their eyeballs and deliver an angry lecture into their empty sockets. | |
3/3 | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Enchant creature When Horrorterror’s Gift enters the battlefield, you draw a card and you lose 2 life. Enchanted creature gets +2/+2 and has flying. | |
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Creature — Zombie Uncommon | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) , Sacrifice a creature: Target creature gets -2/-2 until end of turn. | |
4/4 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Destroy target creature. | |
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Creature — Cat Mutant Rare | |
Deathtouch If a creature would be put into an opponent’s graveyard from anywhere, exile it and put a +1/+1 counter on Mutant Kitten instead. | |
2/1 | |
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Creature — Ogre Common | |
Menace (This creature can’t be blocked except by two or more creatures.) Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) | |
3/3 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Common | |
When Queen’s Enforcer enters the battlefield, all non-Carapacian creatures get -1/-1 until end of turn. | |
The Black Queen is careful to ward off her endless list of potential usurpers. | |
5/4 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Rogue Common | |
: Put a +1/+1 counter on another target Carapacian. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery. | |
She is apparently swooning over a hero of lore shared by the two kingdoms. A great man who united opposing sides against his tyrannical king. | |
2/3 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Assassin Common | |
Pay 2 life: Rooftop Assassin gains flying until end of turn. | |
You can buy anything on Derse, so long as that thing is incredibly illegal. | |
4/2 | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) | |
2/1 | |
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Instant Common | |
Target creature gets -3/-3 until end of turn. | |
THE HEINOUS BATTERWITCH HAS HER GNARLED CLAWS IN EVERYTHING. | |
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Creature — Carapacian Advisor Common | |
When Sinister Steward enters the battlefield, each opponent discards a card. | |
Every bit of advice comes with strings attached. | |
1/1 | |
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Creature — Snake Common | |
When Slithering Basilisk enters the battlefield, each player sacrifices a creature. | |
Basilisks are roughly 20 percent mouth by body weight. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Assassin Common | |
Deathtouch (Any amount of damage this deals to a creature is enough to destroy it.) | |
Being caught in public without your knife is a social faux pass on Derse. | |
2/2 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Remove up to three counters from target permanent or player. Draw a card. | |
An echo of the Vast Honk that is said to mark the beginning of the Dark Carnival. | |
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Legendary Creature — Carapacian Rare | |
Prototype 4 Carapacians you control have flying as long as a creature exiled by The Black Queen has flying. The same is true for first strike, double strike, deathtouch, haste, hexproof, indestructible, lifelink, menace, reach, trample, and vigilance. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
“Put the bunny back in the box.” — Nicolas Cage | |
3/2 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Thorns of Oglogoth deals 2 damage to target creature and you gain 2 life. Put the top two cards of your library into your graveyard. | |
WELCOME TO THE PARTY MOTHERFUCKERS | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1. When enchanted creature dies, return that card to its owner’s hand. | |
Don’t turn your back on the body. | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Target player draws two cards and loses 2 life. | |
“Fly, Pupa!!!!!!!! Flyyyyyyyy!” — Vriska Serket | |
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Creature — Ogre Common | |
Haste (This creature can attack and as soon as it comes under your control.) Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) | |
3/2 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
As an additional cost to cast this spell, discard two cards. Draw three cards. | |
“How do I get through one night without you?” — Michael Guy Bowman | |
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Creature — Snake Common | |
Menace (This creature can’t be blocked except by two or more creatures.) | |
Underlings don’t need to eat, but basilisks do anyway. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Cyclops Uncommon | |
Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) Each creature you control with a +1/+1 counter on it has menace. | |
3/3 | |
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Creature — Lizard Rogue Common | |
, Sacrifice a creature: You get an experience counter. Then, target creature gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of experience counters you have. | |
“god dammit im not actually crying its the fucking onions” — Dave Strider | |
1/2 | |
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Sorcery Uncommon | |
Discard your hand, then draw that many cards plus one. | |
Skaia holds within itself the potential to create a universe. | |
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Creature — Ogre Uncommon | |
, Sacrifice another creature: Deadeye Brute deals 4 damage to target creature. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery. | |
From an ogre’s perspective, imps are both allies and ammunition. | |
4/2 | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
When Devious Imp dies, it deals 2 damage to any target. | |
An imp’s bright idea is dangerous to everyone involved. | |
1/1 | |
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Creature — Snake Rare | |
Haste Prototype 2 , Reveal Devourer of Consorts from your hand, Sacrifice a creature: Target creature can’t block this turn. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Human Knight Common | |
Haste (This creature can attack and as soon as it comes under your control.) At the beginning of the end step, sacrifice Doomed Timeclone. | |
4/1 | |
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Creature — Cyclops Common | |
Enraged Giclops has first strike as long as it’s attacking. | |
Underlings are engineered to act aggressively, designed by SBURB to be acceptable targets for the players to fight. | |
4/3 | |
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Creature — Bird Spirit Rare | |
Flying, haste When Feathered Sprite enters the battlefield, you may discard your hand. If you do, draw that many cards. | |
“caw caw motherfuckers” — Davesprite | |
5/4 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice a creature or artifact. Exile the top X cards of your library, where X is the converted mana cost of the sacrificed permanent. You may play those cards until the end of your next turn. | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Warrior Rare | |
: Karkat Vantas deals 1 damage to target creature. That creature gains haste and first strike until end of turn. | |
“SWEET MOTHER GRUB’S OOZING VESTIGIAL THIRD ORAL SPHINCTER. HOW CAN YOU PEOPLE BE SO STUPID.” — Karkat Vantas | |
3/2 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Choose one or both — • Legendary Piece of Shit deals 4 damage to target creature. • Destroy target artifact. | |
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Enchantment — Aura Common | |
Enchant creature Enchanted creature has double strike. | |
Oh there you are dude. Didn’t see you there. | |
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Instant Rare | |
Choose a creature you control. Create a token that’s a copy of that creature. It gains haste. Sacrifice the chosen creature at the beginning of the next end step. | |
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Creature — Lizard Warrior Common | |
Whenever a source you control deals damage to an opponent, you get an experience counter. When Lockodile attacks, if you have 4 or more experience counters, target creature can’t block this turn. | |
2/2 | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
Whenever a source an opponent controls deals damage to you, you get an experience counter. Sacrifice Loyalty: Loyalty deals 5 damage to any target. Activate this ability only if you have 5 or more experience counters. | |
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Creature — Octopus Common | |
, Sacrifice a creature: Each opponent discards a card. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery. | |
Not even the molten magma seas of LOHAC are free from the influence of the denizens. | |
3/1 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Destroy target land. Meteor Strike deals 1 damage to each creature. | |
“Shortly after 4 A.M. today, a downpour of meteors in a residential neighborhood became yet another instance in a pattern of recent rocky cosmological phenomena.” — The Common Hornographer, April 13, 1996 | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
LOHAC’s underlings emerge from the magma sea to launch attacks, then return to the depths. | |
3/1 | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Enchant creature , Tap an untapped creature you control: Enchanted creature gets +2/+0 until end of turn. | |
“TROLLING IS AN ACTIVITY THAT SHARES A NAME WITH MY ENTIRE SPECIES. DO I GET ON YOUR CASE FOR ALL THE TERRIBLE HUMANNING YOU DO?” — Karkat Vantas | |
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Instant Common | |
Target creature gets +1/+0 and gains haste until end of turn. Draw a card. | |
“HOO HOO HOO” — Nannasprite | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Psychic Prowess deals 4 damage to target creature. If a creature dealt damage this way would die this turn, exile it instead. | |
YOU DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE EAT THE MIND HONEY | |
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Creature — Human Warrior Rare | |
First strike Whenever damage is dealt to a creature you control, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, exile the top card of your library. You may play that card until end of turn. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) Reckless Underling can’t block. | |
3/3 | |
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Instant Mythic | |
Red Miles deals 2 damage to each creature and each planeswalker. If no creatures were dealt lethal damage this way, return this spell to its owner’s hand. | |
You can’t escape the miles. | |
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Creature — Lizard Warrior Uncommon | |
Trample (This creature can deal excess combat damage to the player or planeswalker it’s attacking.) Rockodile gets +1/+1 for each creature your opponents control. | |
Bweeeeee | |
2/2 | |
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Enchantment Rare | |
At the beginning of each player’s upkeep, Rooftop Duel deals 2 damage to that player. , Sacrifice a nonland permanent: Destroy Rooftop Duel. Any player may activate this ability. | |
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Instant Common | |
Destroy target artifact. | |
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Creature — Lizard Wizard Uncommon | |
When Shockodile enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, Shockodile deals 2 damage to each opponent. | |
3/2 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
You get two experience counters, then Sick Fires deals X damage to target creature, where X is the number of experience counters you have. | |
When the pimp’s in the crib ma, Drop it like it’s hot, Drop it like it’s hot, Drop it like it’s hot...” — English Romantic poet, John Keats | |
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Creature — Lizard Advisor Common | |
When Stockodile deals combat damage to a player, you may discard a card. If you do, draw a card. | |
The LOHAC Stock Exchange is a cutthroat place. | |
1/1 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
As an additional cost to cast this spell, discard a card. Sylladex Launch deals 4 damage to any target. | |
The more inconvenient a fetch modus is, the deadlier it can be in the hands of a master. | |
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Creature — Imp Uncommon | |
Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) When Unruly Underling enters the battlefield, it deals damage to you equal to its power. | |
2/1 | |
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Creature — Salamander Warrior Uncommon | |
: Adventurous Consort gets +2/+2 until end of turn. You get an experience counter. Activate this ability only once each turn. Adventurous Consort has trample as long as you have 4 or more experience counters. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Snake Common | |
Flash Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) | |
3/2 | |
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Legendary Planeswalker — Bec Mythic | |
+1: Search your library for a land card and put it onto the battlefield tapped, then shuffle your library. -2: Destroy target artifact or enchantment. -5: You get an emblem with “If one or more counters would be put on you or a permanent you control, put twice that many of those counters on you or that permanent instead.” Starting loyalty: 4 | |
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Creature — Salamander Warrior Common | |
Whenever another creature enters the battlefield under your control, you get an experience counter. Behatted Champion gets +1/+1 and has trample as long as you have 3 or more experience counters. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Common | |
: Add . You gain 1 life. | |
The battlefield’s farmlands exist to supply the kingdoms’ armies, which inevitably makes them targets. | |
1/2 | |
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Instant Common | |
Destroy target artifact, enchantment, or creature with flying. | |
“you can see me, right. tell me what is wrong with this picture.” — John Egbert | |
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Creature — Merfolk Rogue Uncommon | |
When Contraband Smuggler enters the battlefield, create two 0/1 green Frog creature tokens. | |
Consorts go to great lengths to keep frogs safe from Dersite patrols. | |
2/1 | |
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Enchantment — Aura Common | |
Enchant creature Enchanted creature has hexproof. (It can’t be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) : Return Destined Fate from your graveyard to your hand. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery. | |
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Creature — Imp Uncommon | |
When Destructive Pest enters the battlefield, destroy target artifact or enchantment. | |
Imps love to run off with anything not nailed down. | |
1/1 | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
Whenever one or more counters would be put on you, that many counters plus one are put on you instead. | |
“The BATHTUB surges heroically and surpasses the rung: ARCHIMEDES’ AQUACRADLE, proceeding directly to vaunted rung: TAFT-JAMMER.” | |
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Creature — Frog Uncommon | |
Ectobiologized Frog enters the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter on it for each other creature you control. | |
Each ectobiologic frog cloned is an incremental step towards perfection. | |
0/1 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
You get two experience counters. Then, return a permanent card with converted mana cost less than or equal to the number of experience counters you have from your graveyard to your hand. | |
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Creature — Zombie Common | |
, Discard a card: Target creature can’t block this turn. | |
Liches may be more intelligent than SBURB’s other minions, but they are no less destructive. | |
2/3 | |
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Legendary Creature — Frog Rare | |
: Add two mana of any one color. | |
The last piece of the genetic puzzle that is the Speaker of the Vast Croak. | |
0/1 | |
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Sorcery Common | |
Search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, and put it into your hand, then shuffle your library. Create a 0/1 green Frog creature token. | |
LOFAF’s ice holds millions of frogs, released as the forge thaws the world. | |
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Creature — Merfolk Druid Uncommon | |
: Add . If you have 3 or more experience counters, add one mana of any color instead. Whenever you spend mana produced by Forgestoker on a spell, you gain an experience counter. | |
0/1 | |
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Enchantment Uncommon | |
Whenever a token enters the battlefield under your control, you get an experience counter. Sacrifice Frog Hunting: Put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control. Activate this ability only if you have 5 or more experience counters. | |
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Creature — Merfolk Warrior Common | |
When Frogseeker enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, you gain 2 life. | |
LOFAF’s consorts risk life and limb to protect frogs from both Dersite hunting parties and marauding underlings. | |
1/1 | |
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Creature — Cyclops Uncommon | |
Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) Each creature you control with a +1/+1 counter on it has trample. | |
5/5/ | |
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Sorcery Rare | |
As an additional cost to cast this spell, sacrifice two lands. Return three target nonland cards from your graveyard to your hand. Exile Green Sun’s Genesis. | |
S U C K E R S | |
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Sorcery Uncommon | |
Target creature gets +2/+2 until end of turn. All creatures able to block it this turn do so. | |
Jack stabbed Prospitians, stabbed Dersites, stabbed parents. But mostly he just stabbed. | |
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Creature — Salamander Druid Common | |
When Monument Carver enters the battlefield, create a 0/1 green Frog creature token. | |
The consorts erect monuments to the Speaker of the Vast Croak wherever frogs are found to congregate. | |
3/2 | |
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Instant Common | |
Target creature gets +3/+3 and gains trample until end of turn. Put the top three cards of your library into your graveyard. | |
Lusus milk is the secret to being STRONG. Actually it isn’t. You like to think that though. The truth is you’re really strong because you’re kind of a freak. | |
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Creature — Salamander Common | |
When Mushroom Farmer enters the battlefield, reveal the top four cards of your library. You may put a land card from among them into your hand. Put the rest into your graveyard. | |
“Farmin’ these goddamn mushrooms. Fuckin’ pain in the ass.” — LOWAS Mushroom Farmer | |
1/1 | |
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Creature — Salamander Shaman Common | |
When Mushroomancer enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, put a +1/+1 counter on Mushroomancer. | |
2/2 | |
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Creature — Ogre Uncommon | |
Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) When Ogre Champion enters the battlefield, you may have it fight target creature an opponent controls. (Each deals damage equal to its power to the other.) | |
2/2 | |
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Instant Common | |
Target creature you control deals damage equal to its power to target creature you don’t control. | |
This poses no challenge for you at all. | |
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Instant Rare | |
Search your library for a creature card with the same name as target creature you control and put it onto the battlefield, then shuffle your library. | |
“wait... these are baby versions of us?” — John Egbert | |
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Creature — Beast Common | |
Roaming Brute can’t be blocked by more than one creature. Prototype 1 (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) | |
4/3 | |
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Creature — Human Advisor Rare | |
Trample Whenever a creature with power 4 or greater enters the battlefield under your control, you get an experience counter. Whenever you gain one or more experience counters, double target creature’s base power and toughness until end of turn. | |
2/2 | |
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Instant Uncommon | |
Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn, where X is the number of creature cards you own in exile and in your graveyard. Untap it. | |
“YOU MADE AN UNBEATABLE BOSS IS WHAT YOU DID.” — Karkat Vantas | |
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Creature — Wurm Common | |
Trample (This creature can deal excess combat damage to the player or planeswalker it’s attacking.) | |
Underlings are crude, destructive minions. For more delicate tasks, Denizens rely on their children. | |
6/6 | |
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Creature — Imp Common | |
With access to the power of a first guardian, even Imps are deadly threats. | |
4/2 | |
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Creature — Ogre Common | |
Reach (This creature can block creatures with flying.) Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) | |
2/3 | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +2/+2. : Enchanted creature gains hexproof from the color of your choice until end of turn. : Enchanted creature gains first strike until end of turn. | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Spirit Rare | |
When Aradia Medigo enters the battlefield, choose one — • Aradia Medigo gains haste until end of turn. • Tap target creature an opponent controls. That creature doesn’t untap during its controller’s upkeep for as long as you control Aradia Medigo. | |
2/1 | |
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Legendary Creature — Carapacian Advisor Mythic | ||
Haste (This creature can attack and as soon as it comes under your control.) , Sacrifice any number of other creatures with total power 5 or greater: Transform Archagent Jack Noir. | ||
3/2 | ||
Legendary Planeswalker — Jack Mythic | ||
[+1] Each opponent sacrifices a creature or discards a card. [-3:] Jack, Sovereign Slayer deals 4 damage to each creature and each other planeswalker. [-8:] Each opponent loses life equal to half their starting life total. Starting loyalty: 4 | ||
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Creature — Avatar Uncommon | |
You may have Awakened Dreamself enter the battlefield as a copy of any creature you control except it has haste and “Return this creature to its owner’s hand at the beginning of the next end step.” | |
0/0 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Soldier Uncommon | |
Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.) Attacking Carapacians you control get +1/+0. Blocking Carapacians you control get +0/+1. | |
2/2 | |
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Enchantment — Aura Uncommon | |
Enchant creature Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has lifelink as long as you control another enchantment. Enchanted creature gets +1/+1 and has flying as long as there is an enchantment in your graveyard. | |
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Legendary Creature — Human Knight Mythic | ||
Haste When Dave Strider dies, return him to the battlefield transformed under your control. | ||
“im not a hero” — Dave Strider | ||
4/3 | ||
Legendary Creature — Knight God Mythic | ||
Flying, haste : Untap Dave, Knight of Time and remove him from combat. Dave Striker has indestructible as long as he’s not attacking or blocking. | ||
4/3 | ||
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Sorcery Uncommon | |
Choose one or both — • Destroy target creature. • Return target instant or sorcery card with converted mana cost five or less from your graveyard to your hand. | |
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Creature — Cyclops Uncommon | |
Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) When Devastating Giclops enters the battlefield, it deals damage equal to its power to target creature. | |
3/3 | |
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Legendary Planeswalker — Scratch Mythic | |
+1: Scry 1, then reveal the top card of your library. If it’s a noncreature, nonland card, put it into your hand, then discard a card. -2: Exile target nonland permanent until Doc Scratch leaves the battlefield. -3: You get an emblem with “Your opponents play with their hands revealed.” Starting loyalty: 3 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Artificer Rare | |
When Ectobiology Savant enters the battlefield, put the top four cards of your library into your graveyard. Creature spells you cast have prototype 1. (You may exile a creature card from your graveyard as you cast a creature spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it.) | |
2/2 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Artificer Rare | |
, Sacrifice an artifact: Choose one — • Equius Zahhak gains hexproof until end of turn. • Equius Zahhak gains trample until end of turn. • Equius Zahhak fights target creature an opponent controls. | |
6/6 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Wizard Rare | |
, : Target creature gets -2/-2 until end of turn. Whenever you cast an instant or sorcery spell, untap Eridan Ampora. | |
“magic is NOT REAL” — Eridan Ampora | |
2/4 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Wizard Rare | |
Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.) Whenever a nontoken creature you control dies, you may pay 1 life. If you do, create a 1/1 white and black Spirit creature token with flying. | |
3/2 | |
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Creature — Salamander Cleric Uncommon | |
At the beginning of your end step, create a 0/1 green Frog creature token. | |
Like Prospitians, the consorts worship frogs as holy. But while the Prospitians do battle in the name of the Speaker of the Vast Croak, the consorts concern themselves with protecting frogs across the lands. | |
2/4 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Warrior Rare | |
Menace (This creature can’t be blocked except by two or more creatures.) Sacrifice another creature: Gamzee Makara gets +5/+0 and and deathtouch until end of turn. Activate this ability only once each turn. | |
0/5 | |
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Legendary Creature — Human Artificer Mythic | ||
Reach When Jade Harley dies, return her to the battlefield transformed under your control. | ||
“i would like to think that even if i was sad and scared, if i was put in a position where everyone depended on me, i could put all those feelings aside and do whats right!” - Jade Harley | ||
2/3 | ||
Legendary Planeswalker — Jade Mythic | ||
[+1:] Until your next turn, target creature gets +2/+2. Untap it. [-2:] Look at the top two cards of your library. Put any number of land cards from among them onto the battlefield and the rest into your hand. [-6:] Exile up to three target nonland permanents. For each permanent exiled this way, its controller may put a permanent card from their hand onto the battlefield. Starting loyalty: 3 | ||
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Legendary Creature — Human Warrior Mythic | ||
Vigilance When John Egbert dies, return him to the battlefield transformed under your control. | ||
“i’m not your leader, i am your FRIEND, there is a BIG difference!” — John Egbert | ||
3/3 | ||
Legendary Creature — Warrior God Mythic | ||
Flying, vigilance Whenever John, Heir of Breath attacks, he deals 5 damage to each creature with flying defending player controls. John, Heir of Breath has indestructible as long as he’s not attacking or blocking. | ||
3/3 | ||
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Legendary Creature — Troll Vampire Rare | |
Trample (This creature can deal excess combat damage to the player or planeswalker it’s attacking.) Whenever another creature you control dies, you may pay . If you do, return Kanaya Maryam from your graveyard to the battlefield. | |
4/1 | |
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Creature — Zombie Uncommon | |
Necromatic Lich can’t block. : Return Necromatic Lich from your graveyard to the battlefield. : Necromatic Lich gains haste until end of turn. | |
2/1 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Warrior Rare | |
When Nepeta Leijon enters the battlefield, put a ship counter on each of up to two target creatures. Creatures with ship counters on them get +1/+1 and have haste and trample as long as you control two or more creatures with ship counters on them. | |
2/2 | |
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Sorcery Rare | |
If you control a creature you don’t own, gain control of target creature. Otherwise, gain control of that creature until end of turn if it has power 2 or less and it gains haste until end of turn and untap it. | |
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Instant Rare | |
Choose one — • Create X 1/1 white Carapacian creature tokens with vigilance. • Create X 1/1 black Carapacian creature tokens with lifelink. | |
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Legendary Creature — Human Wizard Mythic | ||
Menace When Rose Lalonde dies, return her to the battlefield transformed under your control. | ||
“We will snatch purpose from the jaws of futility.” — Rose Lalonde | ||
3/2 | ||
Legendary Creature — Wizard God Mythic | ||
Flying, menace At the beginning of your upkeep, draw a card. Rose, Seer of Light has indestructible as long as she’s not attacking or blocking. | ||
3/2 | ||
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Creature — Salamander Wizard Rare | |
Whenever an enchantment enters the battlefield under your control or is put into your graveyard from the battlefield, you draw a card and you gain 2 life. | |
“I am a secret wizard. Behold my robes.” — A secret wizard. | |
1/3 | |
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Legendary Creature — Carapacian Mythic | |
When Snowman dies, destroy all nonland permanents. | |
Everyone always ceases gunplay when Snowman’s around. If you kill her you destroy the universe. | |
4/2 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Wizard Rare | |
Flash, haste When Sollux Captor enters the battlefield, choose one — • Sollux Captor deals 2 damage to any target. • Scry 2, then draw a card. | |
2/2 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Druid Rare | |
Whenever a creature with converted mana cost two or less enters the battlefield under your control, you get an experience counter. Creatures you control get +2/+2 and have vigilance and trample as long as you have 10 or more experience counters. | |
2/2 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Soldier Rare | |
Creatures your opponents control lose hexproof and can’t have or gain hexproof. , : Flip a coin. If you win the flip, you may exile target tapped creature. If you lose the flip, draw a card. | |
2/4 | |
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Creature — Beast Rare | |
Prototype 2 , Remove a +1/+1 counter from a creature you control: Underling Overlord deals 3 damage to any target. , Remove a +1/+1 counter from a creature you control: Destroy target artifact or enchantment. | |
4/4 | |
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Creature — Carapacian Mutant Uncommon | |
Prototype 2 (You may exile up to two creature cards from your graveyard as you cast this spell. If you do, it enters the battlefield with an additional +1/+1 counter on it for each card exiled.) When Veilborn Hulk dies, return all cards exiled by it to your hand. | |
2/2 | |
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Legendary Creature — Troll Pirate Mythic | |
Flying, hexproof If you would draw one or more cards except the first one you draw in your draw step each turn, instead search your library for that many cards, and put them into your hand. Then shuffle your library. , Discard a card: Draw a card. | |
4/4 | |
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Creature — Merfolk Advisor Uncommon | |
Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, you get an experience counter. , Sacrifice Wizened Questgiver: Draw two cards and you gain 5 life. Activate this ability only if you have 5 or more experience counters. | |
2/2 | |
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Artifact Rare | |
: Exile an artifact or creature card from your graveyard or your hand. : Another target artifact or creature gains all activated abilities of all cards exiled by Alchemical Apparati until end of turn. | |
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Artifact Common | |
, : Scry 1. (To scry 1, look at the top card of your library. You may put that card on the bottom of your library.) Sacrifice Ancestral Journal: Draw a card. | |
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Artifact Mythic | |
When Beat Mesa enters the battlefield, each player may exile a creature card from their graveyard or hand. If Beat Mesa would be put into a graveyard from the battlefield, exile it instead, then restart the game, leaving in exile all cards named Beat Mesa and all cards exiled by Beat Mesa. Then, put all cards exiled by Beat Mesa onto the battlefield under their owners’ control. | |
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Artifact — Equipment Uncommon | |
Equipped creature gets +2/+0 and has menace. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
Everybody out of the god damn way. You got a hat full of bomb, a fist full of penis, and a head full of empty. | |
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Artifact Common | |
, Sacrifice Colorful Map: Search your library for a basic land card, reveal it, and put it into your hand. Then shuffle your library. | |
“this is the worst crap i have ever seen. what am i looking at here?” — John Egbert | |
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Artifact — Equipment Uncommon | |
Equipped creature has “, : Another target creature you control gets +2/+2 until end of turn.” Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
You will never be caught without a computer, ever. | |
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Legendary Artifact — Equipment Rare | |
Whenever equipped creature deals combat damage to a player, you may exile target artifact or enchantment that player controls. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
Crowbar’s CROWBAR will destroy any temporal artifact and completely negate its effect on the timeline. | |
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Artifact Creature — Construct Common | |
: Dersite Dreadnought gains flying until end of turn. | |
Vast fleets of ships ferry troops to, fight above, and inevitably fall, on the battlefield. | |
5/5 | |
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Artifact — Equipment Common | |
Whenever equipped creature blocks or becomes blocked by a creature, Deudly Firearms deals 1 damage to that creature. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
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Artifact Creature — Horror Common | |
: Each player puts the top card of their library into their graveyard. | |
“hi softass /quivers foam proboscis @ softass” — foamfiend | |
0/2 | |
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Artifact Common | |
Ectobiology Gear enters the battlefield tapped with four charge counters on it. , Remove a charge counter from Ectobiology Gear: Create a 0/1 green Frog creature token. | |
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Artifact — Equipment Uncommon | |
Equipped creature gets +2/+2. Whenever equipped creature attacks, tap target creature an opponent controls. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
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Artifact Uncommon | |
, : Target creature can’t be blocked this turn. | |
A FOURTH WALL, pilfered from a bureaucrat’s office and absconded with years ago. | |
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Legendary Artifact Rare | |
Each creature you control with a +1/+1 counter on it has reach. : Put a +1/+1 counter on target creature. | |
“YES i am going out with this gun!!! no i will not go get a bigger one!!! no i will not take yours!” — Jade Harley | |
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Artifact Creature — Construct Uncommon | |
Flying, first strike | |
When the IMPERIAL DRONE comes knocking, you had better be able to supply genetic material to each of his FILIAL PAILS. If you have nothing to offer, he will kill you without hesitation. | |
3/3 | |
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Artifact Uncommon | |
Whenever a creature you control dies, you get an experience counter. , , Sacrifice Impromptu Memorial: Target creature gets +3/+3 and gains first strike and trample until end of turn. Activate this ability only if you have 5 or more experience counters. | |
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Legendary Artifact — Equipment Rare | |
Equipped creature gets +1/+2 and has menace. Equipped creature has “: You draw a card and lose 2 life.” Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
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Artifact Creature — Construct Uncommon | |
Tap an untapped Carapacian you control: Mecha-Bishop gains first strike until end of turn. | |
From ectobiological monstrosities to massive machines, weapons of every imaginable type are deployed to the battlefield. | |
4/2 | |
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Artifact — Equipment Common | |
Equipped creature has flying and haste. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
These hops are unreal. Shit this flagrant should be illegal. It probably is. | |
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Artifact — Equipment Common | |
Equipped creature gets +1/+1. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
You make a policy of handing out a REGISWORD and a HITLIST to just about everyone who enters your office. | |
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Artifact Rare | |
Whenever a land enters the battlefield under your control, put a charge counter on Server Disk. , Remove a charge counter from Server Disk: Tap target creature. , Remove two charge counters from Server Disk: Draw a card. , Remove three charge counters from Server Disk: Server Disk deals 3 damage to any target. | |
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Artifact — Equipment Common | |
When Sord enters the battlefield, draw a card. Equipped creature gets -2/-2. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
This thing is so unspeakably shitty you are having a hard time even holding it. | |
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Artifact Creature — Construct Rare | |
, Exile Stuffed Bunny: You get two experience counters. Return Stuffed Bunny to the battlefield at the beginning of the next end step. Stuffed Bunny gets +3/+3 and has trample and lifelink as long as you have 4 or more experience counters. | |
1/1 | |
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Artifact Uncommon | |
Whenever one or more creatures attack you, The Stairs deals 1 damage to each attacking creature. | |
You were warned. | |
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Artifact — Equipment Uncommon | |
Equipped creature gets +1/+1 : Untap equipped creature and remove it from combat. Activate this ability only once each turn. Equip (: Attach to target creature you control. Equip only as a sorcery.) | |
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Land Uncommon | |
Battlefield Bastion enters the battlefield tapped. : Add or . | |
A fortress fated to fall, then a fleeting refuge for the survivors, and finally a tomb for the fallen. | |
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Land Common | |
: Add . , Tap an untapped creature you control: Add one mana of any color. | |
The memories of the dead and dreaming given form. | |
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Land Uncommon | |
: Add . , , Sacrifice Frog Temple: Put the top four cards of your library into your graveyard. Then, you may put an enchantment card from your graveyard on top of your library. | |
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Land Common | |
When Grist Trove enters the battlefield, you get an experience counter. : Add . | |
Despite looking like delicious fruit gushers, grist is not actually edible. | |
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Land Rare | |
Land of Frost and Frogs enters the battlefield tapped unless you or a permanent you control has one or more counters on it. : Add or . | |
They wait for she who would thaw solid flesh and resolve it into a dew. | |
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Land Rare | |
Land of Heat and Clockwork enters the battlefield tapped unless you or a permanent you control has one or more counters on it. : Add or . | |
They wait for he who would drop it like it’s hot whilst the pimp’s in the crib. | |
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Land Rare | |
Land of Light and Rain enters the battlefield tapped unless you or a permanent you control has one or more counters on it. : Add or . | |
They wait for she who would breed lilacs out of the dead land. | |
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Land Rare | |
Land of Wind and Shade enters the battlefield tapped unless you or a permanent you control has one or more counters on it. : Add or . | |
They wait for he who would extinguish candles whilst fanning a fire. | |
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Land Uncommon | |
Pipework Nexus enters the battlefield tapped. : Add or . | |
Only the Heir’s song can wipe away Typheus’s clouds. | |
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Land Uncommon | |
Seaside Temple enters the battlefield tapped. : Add or . | |
Without bountiful sea life to support them, the once-mighty civilizations of LOLAR crumbled into ruin. | |
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Land Uncommon | |
Sinking Mechanism enters the battlefield tapped. : Add or . | |
The vast clockwork constructs of LOHAC grind to a halt one by one without Hephaestus to maintain them. | |
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Legendary Land Mythic | |
: Add . If you control a Frog, add one mana of any color instead. Whenever a Frog enters the battlefield under your control, you get two experience counters. At the beginning of your upkeep, if you have 30 or more experience counters, you win the game. | |
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Land Uncommon | |
Thawed Woodlands enters the battlefield tapped. : Add or . | |
With the forge lit, life began to awaken across every corner of LOFAF. | |
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Land Rare | |
The Battlefield enters the battlefield tapped unless you or a permanent you control has one or more counters on it. : Add or . | |
The egg from which a universe will be born. | |
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Basic Land — Forest | |
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Basic Land — Forest | |
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Basic Land — Forest | |
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Basic Land — Forest | |
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Basic Land — Island | |
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Basic Land — Island | |
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Basic Land — Island | |
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Basic Land — Island | |
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Basic Land — Mountain | |
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Basic Land — Mountain | |
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Basic Land — Mountain | |
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Basic Land — Mountain | |
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Basic Land — Plains | |
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Basic Land — Plains | |
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Basic Land — Plains | |
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Basic Land — Plains | |
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Basic Land — Swamp | |
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Basic Land — Swamp | |
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Basic Land — Swamp | |
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Basic Land — Swamp | |
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Token Creature — Carapacian Token | |
Vigilance (Attacking doesn’t cause this creature to tap.) | |
1/1 | |
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Token Creature — Avatar Token | |
Hexproof (This creature can’t be the target of spells or abilities your opponents control.) | |
X/X | |
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Token Creature — Carapacian Token | |
Lifelink (Damage dealt by this creature also causes you to gain that much life.) | |
1/1 | |
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Token Creature — Frog Token | |
0/1 | |
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Token Creature — Spirit Token | |
Flying (This creature can’t be blocked except by creatures with flying or reach.) | |
1/1 | |
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Emblem — Bec Token | |
If one or more counters would be put on you or a permanent you control, put twice that many of those counters on you or that permanent instead. | |
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Emblem — Scratch Token | |
Your opponents play with their hands revealed. | |
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Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Change log: * Changed Queen's Enforcer. * Changed Contraband Smuggler. * Changed Monument Carver. * Fixed art on Cans * New basic filenames
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Fixed art on Becquerel
Change log:
Change log:
Change log:
Added art, changed some cards. Unless playtesting reveals major issues, this should be final apart from some art that needs editing